The Promise

Jean sat by the river as she wept because of a broken promise. As her tears roll down the flowing water she heard a voice, “fulfill my promise to you in the letter. I am serious. I will be there wherever you go, so don’t be afraid to go places. See the world. Have a new life, a new job or a new hobby. I promise you I will be there if I can. You see, I was given a new task to take care of this woman weeping by the river,” said the voice.

“You may feel alone at times, don’t weep. Don’t forget my promise. Though you will have to re-do on your own what we originally planned, as long as your love for me is alive, I will be here to help you. If you only look for me in your soul,” the voice continued.

“It also makes me sad not being able to hold you when you need a hug, or kiss you when I think you look very lovely, or wipe your tears when you cry. It’s the price I have to pay for being so in love with you. My new job is to be your angel.” He contained himself but wanted to say more. Since we are soulmates, it means that our souls are one, we are not meant to be together on earth but our souls are destined to be together in Heaven. The Angel was thinking about the scripture he read that love is letting go.

The woman looked puzzled but asked a question anyway, “why did God take you away from me and only be my angel while we were so happy walking together on earth?”

Because the earth is temporary and heaven is eternal. Given our love for each other, it is heavenly. “Would you still have given yourself to me even if you know I will die soon?” The Angel asked.

Thinking deeply Jean replied, “I would prefer to have wasted time with you for a short moment and feel this overflowing love that transcends eternity than having an average and boring life without it.”

“I know I have always occupied a huge part of your heart and I was so devastated when I found out that I needed to leave. I have talked to the Big Guy, I should not worry. He said he will take care of this special lady for me as I continue my journey to heaven. Now everything is set. Everything here is about love and happiness. No suffering or pain. You will see it when your time comes, but for now, you need to be strong for me. Be happy for me so I can be totally happy to my new home,” said the Angel on a soft and comforting voice.

There might be times when you feel you are lost, don’t worry the Big Guy is in charge. He is always there for you. He knows when you feel fine. He knows when you are feeling your worst. He also knows when you are thinking of me and missing me so much.

“So now He sent me down to guide you on your journey and fulfill my promise to you.” The angel vanished.

Thoughts on Brida

Barstow, Ca 8/7/2015 | Photo: queenie

Among the books of Paulo Coelho, I find Brida to be the closest to my heart although I love all the others. It relates to me as if I am Brida and my husband is the Magus.

In the book, Brida came to the Magus in search of a teacher to learn about the Tradition of the Sun and turned out found her soul mate. The Magus, on the other hand, is a fully knowledgeable teacher who at the first sight of Brida knew instantly that she is his soul mate, his true love.

I love how the author described in detail the process of meeting your soulmate. Just like in the book, I met my husband not knowing that all along, upon seeing me the first time, he knew from his heart I will be his wife. For me, it was definitely not love at first sight. As I feel that I still have a lot to do with my life (and for a young person on her twenties), there are definitely a lot of opportunities ahead of me that if I miss out, I might regret. In choosing our path, it is normal to miss out on the other.

I was thinking of my husband when he affirmed to it. He said to me one day that he understand that I still have a lot to do, like figuring out what I want to do in life and that I am the only one to realize my path. Come to think of it now, his words are indeed so helpful to me. Well, knowing that he is not physically around me anymore, his words echoes through my life, these are the words that somehow help me get through my darkest days.

It is quite amusing that all along, as he let me realize my life, I am quite confused of the feeling every time he is around. In the book, the author describes, this is how we know who our soulmate is — “the light in their eyes”. And how would we know? By taking risks. And I did. And the rest was history.

The Magus realized in the end the most important lesson, that love is liberty. During our short-lived marriage, I can say that I have experienced the love of a lifetime that even after his death, I still survive. At first I was not sure how one survive a death of your partner, but then the answer came saying that as long as his love for me is alive, it will be my oxygen to help me breathe for the rest of my life.

And as for the topic about the possibility of meeting more than one soulmate in our life, the answer is I’m not really sure as I haven’t experienced meeting another one. But maybe, just maybe, when there is one (one day) the love that is keeping me alive will be renewed as I fill my soul again with more love and faith.


Repost from my FB page dated May 17, 2014 @ 2:31am

There will always be one significant person who may not always be there for you but have touched your life to a great extent. Not only will touch your life, but will be the passage way to your whole new life. Some might say that only saints can do such an extraordinary act, but believe me, even angels are dressed like humans.

I’m thankful to have experienced being loved by an angel. Because an angel’s love echoes even after they have gone back to the Heaven’s and the love they have left on earth balances the grief, loss and sadness felt by the one they left behind. This is how I survived, this is how he loved.

I will always miss the humor and down-to-earth intelligence, and even everything as a whole, you are my greatest miracle who made me laugh and cry big time.

Thoughts on your birthday hubby.

Reimagining Life

I was watching this video of Chris Gardner about Life Reimagined. Yep. He is the man behind the true story of the movie Pursuit of Happyness.  It was an inspiring movie and indeed became my instant favorite among many others. So I did my research of what the real Chris Gardner really like.

He became an inspirational speaker and aids the homeless in America by creating foundations that may somehow lift the plight of his fellow struggling people.

Here are some notes I got from his one-hour talk that seriously have tickled my interest to listen from start to finish.

  • How did I get here? the drastic change in his life was when he found himself living with his 2 year old son in the bathroom of a train station. He realized he cannot blame anyone from his misfortunes. He said, “I have something to do here”.
    • Acceptance. It will free us from imprisonment to our current situation. Let us not spend our whole life blaming others why we got here. It was our actions, in the first place, that brought us here.
    • No one will accept your life except you.
    • “You cannot change something until you own it.” Once we accepted our shortcomings, change will start. Most of the time we call it “miracle”.
    • “I drove here. But you know, if I drove here, I can get out of here.”
  • What are you going to do? he felt he has a mission in this world. He knew he can do something to get out from his situation. So, he took action.
    • The moment, whether we like it or not, wherein we re-imagine our life. See yourself as someone who has a role to play in the world.
    • You are a unique human being so, make the most out of the talent the good Lord have given you.

I liked the part when he talked about soulmates. I connected with him there. I believe in one. He is right. He knew that his first wife was his soulmate. I may read his mind and say that if his soulmate hadn’t died, he would have had a completely different but perfect life. But there is nothing perfect in this world. That was the start of re-imagining his life.

  • Losing someone you love is the hardest “re-imagining life” that could ever be. “When you lose a loved one, you re-evaluate everything. You can lose a house, get a new house. You lose your job, find a new job. You lose money, make money. But when you lose someone you love, it’s irreplaceable – you cannot make time. Time is the ultimate luxury.” – I super agree.
  • You become more aware of the quality of your life. Whether you like it or not, you have to perceive yourself on a different light.
  • “Life is a stretch of road with no maps, no road signs and no gps. There is a fork on this road; one is scared and don’t know what to do and the other is scared but I’m stepping out of it.” There are still choices though we feel there is none. Sometimes we just need to take a short break to get to the next chapter.
  • From it all, we need external validation from people who believe in us. We are humans anyway we were raised to be mingling with others. Family and true friends are very important materials in the fulfillment of our role.

Although there are a lot more of the inspiring things he discussed, these are some of my pointers that somehow, connected in me. On how I perceive my life.

“Walk that walk and go forward all the time. Don’t just talk that talk, walk it and go forward. Also, the walk didn’t have to be long strides; baby steps counted too. Go forward.” Chris Gardner