Carrying the Old Soul from the Past

when we open our eyes to greet the morning, we also open our soul to the world.
done with the tears of the night, as we start a new day.
for the dreams of the past will not be able to make its way to the future.

the past that gave color to our spirit and once made us want to look forward to the future. dreams that will forever be kept in the dark.

the point where fate made its sincerest conclusion of letting us suffer.

the past where the toughest decisions were made. decisions that once set will forever be marked in the path. No chance to turn back.

slowly removing the worries.

knowing much clearer that if the day didn’t turn out right,
the night would fall again and tomorrow will start anew.

A brand new journey in life carrying the old soul from the past.

Planning Ahead

I used to envy people with the potential to smoothly take charge of their life. Well, they are either leaders or managers of their company anyway. They start with a goal and then step by step direct their plans in order to reach that goal. Being able to do this and distinguish the road blocks along the way is undeniably an admirable attitude towards life. Ain’t that a God-given talent or what?

When I was younger I used to plan out everything, as I wanted to be like the leaders who inspires me, from my day’s activities up to how I would like to end my week. Hey, I want to take charge of my life. I ended up feeling tired and frustrated.

Planning ahead never worked for me.

I realized, God have plans in my life to help me get to the path I am supposed to go to. I once watched this movie years ago, A Walk to Remember, and this quote has been stuck in my mind since then.

“God has a bigger plan for me than I have for myself. Like this journey never ends.” Jamie Sullivan, A Walk to Remember

Through all these years, He holds my path. So I decided (what the heck!) might as well follow where He leads. Planning has never been a good ingredient in my life but I know I still need to do something and not just wait for my fate to come by.

Then there is VISION. My mother used to say, “see yourself what you want to be at age 30 and that you will be when you’re on that age”. Only 14 or 15 years old at that time I did not take that seriously, but I made a vision. You know what, I got that vision, probably, years earlier. Although, unconsciously, I practiced to always perceive what I want to be doing in the next 10 years of my life. Although there are times I feel in doubt to reach that vision, I still hold into it and I think this is what they call FAITH. I try to hang on that, everytime.

I always have plan B or even C since plan A is already in front of me. Plan A is my PRESENT. If “present” didn’t work out, I try my best to take the next best option and tell myself that it probably wasn’t meant for me. I call it ACCEPTANCE. I get frustrated at times when the first plan never materialize but then the voice inside of me keeps on saying that there is always a better option and that, the best option was the one I’m supposed to be doing.

Sometimes what WE THINK we want differs on what WE REALLY want. We think “what we want” are the situations that will define our life, but what we forget are the hidden desires of our heart. The petition that only you and God talked about. These desires and secret dreams will materialize when we are ready, and the REAPER knows exactly when the fruit is ripe.

“The will of God is not something you add to your life. It’s a course you choose. You either line yourself up with the Son of God…or you capitulate to the principle which governs the rest of the world.”  Elisabeth Elliot