“Be open to everything yet attached to nothing.” Buddha
We cannot avoid the feeling of attachment. Once we start to get used to things, once we setup routines the more we get to be attached. The harder it is for us to remove ourselves in the picture.
And that overcoming attachments is simple to say but hard to take into action.
I like what the Buddhists call non-attachment. As everything in this world is temporary, and that these things, events or people will eventually come to its end.
Once they have fulfilled their purpose in your life, they will leave. And the hard truth is you have to let them because if you don’t, it will only cause you unending cycle of pain and suffering.
Acceptance is the key. Because if you do, it will liberate you and you will never realize that you have surpassed the test and moved on to the next level.
Let go of the attachments but take note of the lessons it brought as these lessons will be of great use in your future.
“Most of our troubles are due to our passionate desire for and attachment to things that we misapprehend as enduring entities.” Dalai Lama
It sometimes is so hard for me to visit you, my love.
Because everytime I walk this long path to you, the burden in my heart doubles.
Because everytime I buy you flowers, makes me angry for you leaving me.
Because everytime I see you, makes me realize the reality that you are never going back.
And that in reality I am mad at you for leaving to a place you know I can never follow.
But most of the time I am sad for knowing that I will never see you anymore even in my dreams that once was better than reality.
When you feel that it is time, then let it go. There is no other way moving forward but to let go of the rope that connects both of you.
It probably is the fate of the friendship after all. A pure and innocent one. A relationship who enjoys a cup of coffee in the morning and closes the day with another by the sunset to perfect the picture.
The line has been crossed. The one to which both of you dared not touch – but you did. You both did. So no one is to blame.
Just as anything is meant to happen, that moment will of course form part of my bank of memories as whatever it is we call, was special.
And now, the chapter with you is already finished. I have to say that it was a cool and relaxed trip that you can always read back through with a cup of coffee on the side.
..and then you came into my peaceful abyss.
I was shaken.
I never thought I would feel this way again nor have I forgotten the feeling of being loved.
It feels good.
No matter how hard I try to deny, the feeling is already there.
Sadly, what I am feeling is wrong. Whatever it is, I know this is not love.
If it is, then I wont be feeling hurt or sad or confused. It will lift my soul up. As high as the clouds could reach. Closer to the love only my soulmate could give.
I was perfectly occupied with my world. Convincing myself that I am a contented widow living my life with all the treasures of the world at my hands reach.
Adoring my husband everyday, claiming that he never really left. He is still the one providing for me. Gave me all that he can offer assuming he is still alive. And I will always be eternally grateful for that.
And love. His love, like the air I breath – it was always there. Comforting me every time I feel sad or unsure or about to lose faith. He is my equalizer.
But life, really is not my best friend. A mysterious foe. The moment I say contentment, it gives me something to think about. The moment I say balance, it shakes me.
Now I have to decide if I am really happy or just plainly contented with life.